Monthly Archives: April 2014

Yearning

yearning

noun

1.

deep longing, especially when accompanied by tenderness or sadness.
2.

an instance of such longing.

 

It’s the conundrum of motherhood – the bittersweet passing of time as I watch my baby grow, coupled with the rejoicing at each new milestone. I’ll be honest, I’ve never been one to enjoy the newborn stage and I certainly don’t wish to go back to those few months.

And yet… there is a yearning for that time, that brief period where her entire existence was dependent upon my meeting her every need. For 10 months she was wholly a part of my being while entirely her own person; and then came the birth, the sleepless nights, the constant feedings, the diaper changes – on and on. Each moment seeming long and brief all at the same time until slowly she started becoming more of who she is. Day by day, new achievements, new milestones, new moments of independence, and I watch as my heart slowly learns to function on its own, outside of me.

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